Louis Dean and I just happenstance to arrive at Trail Lake Nursing Home within an hour of their Christmas Social. We had no idea but were happy to be there and joined right in.
Everything was decorated and cheerful.
Normally, I stop at the nurse's station and deliver my goodies.....which I did on Friday.
I had made Fruitcake cookies and left them there. Then the first room I come to is Mother's and I peeked in and saw that she was eating lunch so I decided to go on in and give her one of my homemade banana muffins......the same kind I gave her last week that she so enjoyed. She was happy to see us.
I still had had lots of muffins to deliver and the party was to start at 2:00 so I wanted to get on with it before it started. Mother was not happy when I left to give the rest of my muffins away.
Alas, I left Louis Dean in the room with her and that wasn't good.
After I had given out a few, Louis Dean told me he would be waiting for me in Lillian's room - which is where I should have left him in the first place.
Lillian was all dressed up and excited about the party!
Louis Dean took our picture.
I accidentally visited Bob, who is the resident Santa Claus, while he was getting dressed.
His room mate is on a liquids only diet so Bob called me on back to his side of the room so he could grab a snack before his performance.
Here is Roberta - the classiest lady in the place and my role model!
I got a good pic of Lillian and Santa Claus!
It was a great party and the staff outdid themselves.
There were gifts for all the residents!
You would think by these pictures that it was a lovely afternoon and I hope it was for many of the residents. In reality, I left there with my hair on fire! The mere two and a half hours I was there used up every ounce of my patience and all the smiles I had in me!
When we walked to the car I was breathing deeply of the fresh air and felt so relieved to be out of there. I am being real here.
Mother is back to her more normal self these days. I don't know if they adjusted her meds or what but she is pretty much her old self. Which is not really good......
She was mean spirited and hateful when I delivered the muffins to other residents....did not like her gifts and was not nice to me or anyone else.....
and I am not going to say any more but it was an extremely hard visit and I am thankful I was able to keep a smile on my face and escape in good grace.
We made it home in good time without a lot of traffic which is a miracle on a Friday afternoon.
I was so happy to be in my pretty Christmas house and I thought I could throw off the trauma and drama of my time with Mother......but it didn't work out that way. I melted down.
I went to bed early and cried myself to sleep.....after praying for a good while asking God to redeem that awful day.
I woke up Saturday morning feeling all zig zag inside.
Louis Dean brought me coffee in bed and I opened my prayer journal and spent some time praying.....
and shortly after I finished praying while I was making up the bed, I got a text from Dean and Sherry....
"Turned out nice today. If y'all want to run down, we have anything you don't bring."
I took that as an answer to prayer and within two hours we were on our way!
We drove straight through to Waco only stopping at one rest stop on the way.
El Conquistador for a late lunch and a margarita!
Louis Dean was happy with his fajitas!
This was the first time ever that I did not finish my margarita.
I only drank half of it....what a waste! It was really good.
We drove on in to Mart and bought milk at the Dollar Store.
Driving down Texas Avenue.......we noticed that the Firewater store was open!
I had to stop and go in and meet the owner!
He's only 21 years old and from Nebraska and gifted with so many skills including carpentry!
All the displays were made by him using reclaimed wood from this historical site.
It is a beautiful shop.......
And he is an amazing young man!
He has other ventures in progress - a full gym and loft apartments and more.
Mart is grateful to have this new blood come to join the city!
We drove on to the ranch.....
I could feel myself relax more with every mile....
County Line Road......looks simple. Feels special.
Louis Dean stops for photo ops! He's such a good guy!
Mr. Jackson's cattle - just across the road from the ranch.
We drove in with no problem and unloaded the essentials and then walked down to see the critters.
The baby geese are all big now and have an attitude!
Such a scenic peaceful setting......
I could sit here and stay for a long time......
Our camper is just across the tank and on the right......
Louis Dean was glad to get me 'Out of Dodge' as he calls it.
This is my peaceful place.....
and that right there is my happy place.
I was so glad to be here!
We came in and settled down to go to bed.
In the country, once it gets dark you think about going to sleep.
As it turned out, I had taken the sheets off the bed when we were here last in August, so I opened up the cupboard above the bed to get the linens down and found that they were all wet.....
We thought there might be some water coming in after all the rains they have had here.
The camper roof is delicate and Louis Dean put 'stuff' on it a couple of years ago and that fixed the water coming on on my side of the bed. But he also had done a lot of repair prior to that so this has been been an ongoing problem. Louis Dean says these campers are not built to last long.
SO! I slept comfy, dry and warm in the girl bunk and Louis Dean rolled up Indian style in the cozy blankets and all was well. We went to bed early and slept well.
I love our mornings together. Home and here.
It doesn't take much to make me happy!
I was mesmerized by the smoke swirl of the coffee.
Once our reading time was over - and Louis Dean was awake - he went to work.
We do not have a complete Bible here - and we need to bring one!
So we read Proverbs from a Gideon gift Bible when we are here.
31 chapters for 31 days of the month.
He did the work he wanted to do and we hope it does the trick.
Sooner or later he will need to put a roof over the camper.
This afternoon I decided to go out and feed some critters.....
I noticed the horses milling around.
These two ate a bag of mini carrots.
This one was late to the event and didn't get anything.
In the morning I will feed him first.
Dean and Sherry came down to pass the time for a few minutes between their projects.....
and I was finally able to give Dean the gift I bought for him in Oregon when we were visiting my friend Linda and her son Roger. Roger took us on a Sake tasting and I bought a bottle for Dean.
Who knew it would take so long before I could give it to him.
Later in the afternoon we took our scraps down to the new goat pen.
On our way I gave the ducks the 'Gourmet Critter Food' I had bought in Colorado for them.
They started quacking as soon as they saw me and came right up off the water and marched into the pen every single one of them.
We walked on down to the meadow - my favorite place.
In my normal life here - I would call my friend, Linda in Oregon. on Saturdays.
We have had lots of good conversations down here.
I am feeling like myself again.
Louis Dean is really happy about that.
I didn't mean to be mean ...so it was a good thing I just went to bed early Friday night.
I hate it feeling ugly.......and am grateful for Louis Dean being so kind to me. Always.
I painted today while he did the repairs.
I think I paint better here than I do at home.
Louis Dean built us a good fire tonight.
Sherry had brought up some good firewood for us....
I love our place down here.
It's Glamping at its finest. And I love it!
Wine, leftover pizza from home, and a Hallmark movie......Perfection!
By coming to the ranch I missed being a part of taking Reaoma's ashes back to East Texas.
Pam has been on my mind today.
Love and prayers for her tonight and many happy thoughts of Reaoma as she was in life.
She left me with so many good memories and gifts to my heart of her time, love and care that she spent on me and my children. She blessed my life and I hope when I leave this world I can have blessed others as she did mine.
We will go home tomorrow. Not early. I will drag my feet and not leave until the afternoon.
I am feeling like myself again and will pace myself as we approach Christmas.
I am puzzled how something like an afternoon with Mother could send me into a mental frenzy and meltdown. I thought I was stronger than this. I was wrong.
I need to be more aware of the triggers that can send me spiraling into feelings that are not good.
It's crazy but when we think we are strong and past all the drama and trauma.....we really aren't.
We are all only one step away from being overwhelmed by life.
And I bid you all a good night.
It's 9:30 here in the country so I am going to bed now.
If I were at home, I would be getting a second wind and starting another project.
I think I could get used to this country life.......
25 comments:
Country life is the best and by the sound of your visit with your mother, it was just what you needed. Quiet and calm, the perfect remedy to feed the soul. You are an amazing artist! Your painting of Santa Claus is so incredible. Man when I see things like I'm thinking professional, so girl you are a professional painter in my book! Glad you are back to your ol self! Have a wonderful week.
XX00
Saimi
Hugs and Love for you Linda (and LD ! ) and prayers too. So VERY glad you went to Dean and Sherry's place and had your time to pull things back to reality for you. A blessing indeed.
Joy
Sounds like a trip to the country is just what you needed. So glad you got to go!
Some days can be like that and we cannot always be strong. Thank you so much for the Christmas card. I lone it and will frame it. Your Santa with the cardinal is beautiful. Maybe next year that will be your Christmas card. Love to the Chapmans.
Linda, you are a very strong woman. What you need to remember is that you’re still grieving the loss of Reoma and so this change in your mom‘s behavior back to her regular behavior caught you off guard while you were emotionally down. I’m so glad you had these days at the ranch.
When we have loss, and then are busy, it catches up with us, and we can become upset easily. Praying for you, friend.
I am so glad you are in the country right now. You know, I really think that you ARE stronger than you say. It is just the fact that our mothers know just where and how to push our buttons. The relationship between mothers and daughters is often so strong ad complicated. And I also think that this was maybe about more than just this one incident. Just the stress of going there so much & never knowing what to expect, and Raeoma passing. It all builds up. Maybe for your own health you should not go back there quite as much. You have sure been dedicated and a wonderful daughter. But you need to also think of yourself. I want to continue to hear your happy laugh. Your Santa is wonderful it does seem that you paint better in the country!
It is overwhelming to have a parent in a nursing home...I remember well. I wish your mom could forget how to hurt you!!
There are so many potential paintings in those photos!
So glad Louis knew just where you needed to be. :)
I am glad you got away from your home and back to one of your favorite places. Your mother sounds like a very unhappy lady and extremely difficult to deal with. However, you probably wouldn't be able to live with yourself if you reacted in anger. It sounds to me as if you are handling a bad situation in the best possible way.
Glad you had a good visit!! Sorry about your upset! Love the Christmas card!! Thank you!!
“You are stronger than you know”
It was such a busy day at the home that perhaps it was not possible to chat with the medical staff. Hope that someone has mentioned this switch back to former behavior to them. Then, too, I know from experiences in my family, that some medications just don’t work out. Praying for you all. Life is certainly messy by times and I am sad that you had such a day.
Glad that you got away for a while. A shift of perspective is a blessing. And that Louis Dean? Hug him tight. 😁
This must have been needed....time to renew and refresh....I loved it too! That is the most beautiful country...I am so sorry your visit did not go well...it's not on your shoulders however....relax and enjoy those you love....wishing you a very MERRY and Blessed Christmas Day Linda...big hugs!
Hugs Linda....hope you are feeling better after your time in the country. It is very restorative. We are heading to Grimmwood on Wednesday!
sorry for the drama trauma at the home and glad you are in the peaceful country now and that is why you paint better there. no drama. I rather visit animals anytime over humans. the shop in mart is beautiful... talented young man... I to am sometimes ugly, but then so is bob. it is part of life, and like you we get over it and move on and hold each other up
Who can understand how someone can be so hateful. Hard to be around but in the end it hurts her the most. No one is prepared to be treated badly. The ranch is just what the Dr. ordered....it is a peaceful place.
Oh my, my heart goes out to you. So sad that what should have been a happy visit with your mom turned out to be such a miserable time. You are blessed to have a happy place to go to. That country home is a gift that just keeps on giving with it's peace so abundant there. Enjoy every moment. Hope you are able to go home renewed and refreshed and have a happy Monday.
Oh, Linda. Strong doesn't mean not feeling those things - it means keeping on while you have those feelings. I'm so glad you got to your happy place.
Unfortunately sometimes dementia brings out the worst in people, the same with my Mother in Law. Last Christmas she looked at us like she wanted to kill us. In the summer on hubbys visit she wouldn't wake up. This time was much better. I am sorry that visiting your Mom is so difficult sometimes, hugs
Thoughts and prayers for you Linda and so thankful you could "get outta
Dodge" and find peace and contentment in the country. Just love the Santa
and the red cardinal. Your deep faith will carry you thru. love, Phyllis
Does your Mom have dementia, honey, or is that her "normal" disposition? Either way, try not to take it personally and keep your Mom & you in completely separate bubbles... with her bubble not even exchanging oxygen with yours. Her behaviors, moods, words, reactions are just that... hers. And if she's anything like my Mom was, she can keep them to herself, thank you. **big hugs** Love you, Andrea xoxo
Hi Linda, I'm sorry you had such a trying visit...the photos of the ranch are amazing and I loved the two videos! So nice to hear your sweet voice, that smoke swirl in the coffee was mesmerizing! :) Your Santa painting is marvelous!!! I'm still waiting for your slideshow!! ;) Oh that camper really does look so cozy, no wonder it's your happy place. Glad you're feeling better. Before I left my toxic family behind many years ago, I felt physically and emotionally exhausted any time I was visiting with them. Everything was so negative, sarcastic and just plain ugly with them that my spirit just couldn't take it. I absorbed all of that negative energy to the point where I stayed in bed for days after, just recovering. I'm highly empathetic, you probably are too, so you feel things much more deeply than most people. It's hard to spot triggers and signs sometimes, because we just get blindsided - it doesn't mean you are weak or "not strong"! Take care friend. xx
It must be very frustrating for your mother to be old and frail - maybe being so grumpy is her way of getting noticed.... You are a trooper for looking after her so well. Maybe instead of letting her annoy you you could just laugh... I know this advice is very hard to follow - I have a sister who pushes all my buttons but I have decided to be relentlessly kind to her from now on. Wish me luck. Cheers
Hope you weren't too down about your visit to see your mum. Seems like you had a good time after that, despite the leek in the camper ceiling! :)
Drama and trauma is a good way to put it... visits to the nursing home can be so unsettling. This is my reality too. Wishing you peace and energy this Christmas season.
I miss not living out in the country.
It brings me such peace to visit there now and at night, it is so quiet and dark that I feel like I've burrowed down into a deep nest and won't open my eyes until the sun comes shining through the window.
It was unfortunate that the holiday visit turned out less than cheerful. Family members can certainky pull the right triggers sometimes when you least suspect it. Good that your were able to get out and unwind. Hope your holiday spirits won’t be dampened.
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