Life Celebrations! Both Different and Both Beautiful!

All six Bells headed to Boston on Saturday.

Hockey camp for Harrison in Boston and hocky lessons in Connecticut for the girls.

Look how grown they are!!

They will have a great week!!

Saturday was a true celebration for the life of Vernon Wendell West.

Louis Dean and I arrived and the street was lined with cars on both sides.

There was a canopy set up with grills going and chairs lined the driveway.

People were laughing and talking and smiling and there was so much joy and love even in the midst of sorrow.

I met many of my friend, Judy's, family I had not met before. Judy is to the left and her best friend is on the right.

Vernon and his wife, Debbie.

I met her through blogging and she adopted me into her family of girlfriends.

I love her and her mom like family.

She blogged for several years as Ladybug From Texas.

Debbie is a gifted photographer as well as worked side by side with her husband in their business.

To know this family is to love them and I do.

Louis Dean and I both agreed that this is the way we want to be remembered....

with love and laughter and joy and good memories.

The West family did it all right and was a tribute to a truly great man.

We had our Saturday night dinner and movie.

It's a tradition Ileeen and I started a long time ago and now Summer joins us so it's a bigger party and sometimes our friend, Shirley, joins us as well.

This is my all-time favorite movie.

I can quote nearly the entire movive by heart.

Our sweet Tabitha.

Summer brought lunch over for us on Monday.

Louis Dean was a happy camper!

He said, "LOOK! Even the hamburger is smiling!!"

In addition to lunch, Summer had researched online and ordered some Brod Bagert poetry books for him.

He was absolutely ecstatic!

We celebrated Ileen's birthday on Monday.

She has so many friends and here are some of them!

They all took her out for lunch!

Then we celebrated Monday night with dinner for her.

Ileen is such a good friend to me.

I tell her, "You make me feel normal."

And she does.....

It was a great evening.

Tuesday was an exciting day!

Muniz Tree Service arrived with a crew of five at 8:30 that morning.

They worked for three solid hours and worked magic!

They did a great job!

The canopy of both pecan trees were lifted.

We may not have a pecan crop this year as the trees may be in shock since we trimmed them out of season.

I think it was more important to get them done before storms bring down more limbs and branches.

Every time it comes a hard rain, the yard is littered with tree debris.

They even cleaned out our gutters and blew decks off AND left the yard looking better than ever!

The crew was gone by the time I left to thrift with Brenda.

I found some real treasures.

This is going to a special friend for her birthday.

I'm hoping these Sheetlock things work!

Most mornings I wake up and the sheets have come loose - on Louis Dean's side of the bed.

This candle smells delicious and has some bling in the soy wax.

Guess where I hung this sign?

YUP! Louis Dean's John Wayne style bathroom.

I scored big on the Lovery bath set and this will make a good Christmas gift for someone I know.

You can't have too many good books.

Brenda found this for me as well as a Chico's jacket that was 75% off!

To finish up my finds - a sweet lemon candle and fancy napkin rings AND a pair of classy earrings.!!

All in all it's been a good week and it's not over yet!

Thank you all for your kind words and prayers.

Some days are better than others but every single day is the day the Lord has made and we will be glad and rejoice in it!

Children in the Closet.....Chapter 40

 Chapter 40

The next few days and over the weekend were very different now that Jesse wasn’t here. We were all more relaxed and Amber and Benjamin invited several friends over so it was a party atmosphere with lots of talking and laughing and having fun.

Summer had bought a pop-up camper and we had a good time setting that up on the driveway. It was a healing few days and I knew they wouldn’t last so I enjoyed every single minute.

Jesse kept a low profile for another few days but Amber, Benjamin and I had some serious arguments. They didn’t understand that I was motivated by my love for them and not to simply make their lives miserable.

We continued to ride the roller coaster of emotions. Bought our Hurricane Harbor summer passes and had a good first day at the water park. Jesse took Amber and Benjamin out to eat that evening and I went over to Summer’s apartment and we went out to dinner.

Then Jesse’s mood switched back and forth and there were more confrontations with Amber so my heart was sick with grief and sorrow.

May turned into June and some days were easier and others were awful. Jesse would take all the money out of our joint account and demand I turn our business books over to him and then a few days later he would give me the books back and restore the money in the accounts. I had handled payroll and all the quarterly reports for Workman’s Comp plus all our tax work. Truth was Jesse had never handled the finances before. Not our personal ones or the business books.

We had a family gathering one Saturday afternoon in June at Mother’s home. She had delivered twins back in 1958 after she married Clayton and the boy baby died and we the girl baby had been kidnapped when she was just a few weeks old.  Sharon was the daughter’s name and through genealogic research, she discovered her birth mother. She and her husband lived in Alabama but they traveled to Texas to meet Mother and the four of us siblings. The Fort Worth newspaper even did a big write up.

It was a good time of getting to know one another. Mother, Lloydine and Charlie, daughter Trisha, Lanita and Lonnie as well as Nita’s daughter, Leah, and Amber, Benjamin and Jesse and his wife were all there.

We thought we had a dysfunctional childhood but we came to learn that our sister, Shari, had an even worse one.

During the course of the summer so many things happened. We had a new roof put on and one of the workers fell through the den ceiling. I took advantage of that opportunity to have them repair that as well the ceiling was damaged when I had the chimney fire and there was another repair to the sheetrock in the closet. It felt good to make decisions on my own.

Amber began treatment for her back at Scottish Rite Hospital and she and I continued to be at odds with one another. Amber continued to confront her father and would not put up with verbal abuse from him. I admired the way she stood up to him – something I wish I would have done a long, long time ago. Jesse had always been verbally abusive but there was a scene that summer where he was physically abusive to Benjamin.

I grew so weary with all the ups and downs that one night I keened as I drove to my support group. I had called Mother and poured out all the conflicts of my heart which had brought me to the place where I was keening like a wounded animal. My poor Mother listened to me on the phone and I know it must have broken her heart to hear me in so much emotional pain. It seemed the struggles with my husband and now my children had only grown worse and wave after wave of pressure and despair surged against me and I could barely stand up against it.

By July it seemed Jesse had reached a turning point in his anger, resentment and bitterness toward me and I was worn down with all the surviving and coping.  In August we made a trip to San Antonio together and, while I truly didn’t want to let him come back home, I still felt it was the right thing to do.

I continued with my counseling sessions and support group meetings while Jesse continued with his treatment at Minireth Meier Clinic. 

In September Jesse, Benjamin and I went to Colorado and after four months, Jesse came home. Amber was against him returning so she left home to live with Summer.

My first grandchild was born September 27th and I insisted we stop by Jesse Jr’s house so we could see him on our way home from Colorado. His parents named him Samuel and he would prove to be such a comfort and blessing in the years that followed.

By Christmas I knew in my heart of hearts that I had made a huge mistake taking Jesse back, but what was done was done and I was hoping for the best.

Remembering Nita, Shade Cloth, HEB , Gorilla Glue and a Good Report For Louis Dean....

 The Texas heat has arrived and so far the cats are still enjoying being outside!

I do notice that after a full day out they usually stay inside for most of the next day.

We are not early risers but we do try to get out and water the kitchen side of the back yard.

Watering is time consuming and I encourage Louis Dean to do it as often as he can.

My herb garden was suffering from the direct sun so Monday Louis Dean and I made a small awning from shade cloth to give it some protection. Plus we can use the shade as we water.

However, I got too hot and was down and out on Tuesday.

No Tuesday Treasues or housework or anything but staying either in the bed or in the den.

Louis Dean was lonely that day but I couldn't help it and I couldn't take care of him or myself.

I opened a can of chicken noodle soup (he can't figure out how to use the can opener) and he heated it for me.

He hovered a good bit but I honestly just wanted to be alone and rest.

I ended up watching all eight episodes of I Will Find You and it was well worth the watch and kept me entertained with all the twists and turns of the plot.

We have a new HEB right here in Irving!!

Amber picked me up on Wednesday afternoon and we had a great time shopping and visiting together.

Amber and I were introduced to HEB back in 2011 when she and Mike lived in Katy, Texas.

Amber found a few favorites as well as our old standbys....

She was excited to find her very favorite sugar cookies!

Amber never comes to visit without spending time with her dad.

She has loved him since the first day she met him and he loved her and legally adopted her in 2012.

She wanted HIM to be the official and legal granddad to her children plus - more importantly - she wanted HIM to be her dad!

And so he is!!

Louis Dean had an appointment on Thursday with his cardiologist......

Alas, an hour before we were to leave, he had an encounter with a bottle of Gorilla Glue!

He was trying to thin down a thick bottle of glue with hot water.

This did not end welll.

I took him to the appointment in his dirty overalls and soiled shirt while he was still picking flakes of Gorilla glue on the way.

As we sat in the waiting room - he kept peeling dry flakes off and left a trail through the waiting and examining rooms.

They even gave him a pair of those blue exam gloves to wear!

In spite of the circumstances - Louis Dean received a good report!

His pacemaker is working 98% of the time.

Last year  it was 88%.

So it's doing its job!

We did errands on our way home and then I more or less went in a stupor.

I am constantly realizing more and more the limitations Louis Dean is experiencing.

Even simple things aren't simple anymore.

As in loading the beverage fridge in the gazebo.....

he can no longer take the trash out or follow simple instructions.

It's easier to do everything myself while still finding ways he can help and feel useful.

Opening jars and doing small repairs that require duct tape or Gorilla glue - and that's risky!

Watering is another thing he is good at and he has the patience of Job!

Since he saves me time in watering for me, I worked in the kitchen and made a good potato salad.

With homemade hamburgers and fresh watermelon and cantaloupe - it was Friday night's supper!

And to top it all off - a program Louis Dean is loving!!

I close with this photo of my beautiiful sister, Nita.

Monday marked her fourth year of being in heaven.

Not that there's actual 'time' in heaven.

I asked God to let her know how much I love her and that I am looking forward to seeing her before too long.

Our July Fourth Weekend.....

 Summer came over early Friday morning and had been working a couple of hours outside pulling weeds before I even woke up!

She is a good photographer and took some great pictures of our trumpet vines.....

......and our sunflowers!

 I joined her in doing some work in the back yard while Louis Dean filled up the three bird feeders we bought recently and repaired the bird camera feeder Amber gave her dad for Christmas.

The squirrels had eaten through the wires from the camera to the feeder and he fixed them and then protected the wire in a pvc pipe and duct tape.

Now we just need to reprogram it and we will be back in business.

So far we've had thirty different bird species visit!

The Bells celebrated the Fourth in their rental home while their second floor is being renovated.

Amber makes every holiday special for her family.

They had fun watching fireworks on Friday and on Saturday they watched Independence Day and then moved on to Top Gun!

Having fun takes a lot of energy and our days of staying out after dark or being in large crowds are all but over. The heat has arrived in Texas with triple digits so it's really not a good idea to be outdoors.

We do most of our work in the yard before noon or after 7:00 PM and we always stay in the shade if possible.

We did do Dinner and a Movie Saturday night and Summer, Ilene and Shirley joined us.

Dinner was taco salad and pepper poppers and drinks.

True to our tradition - we watched our movie and was surprised to learn that neither Ilene nor Shirley had ever watched this movie.

My children and I have watched this evevry Fourth of July since 1996!

The Bells all attended church this morning and then Amber and Mike dropped the kids off at church camp!

I can't wait to hear all about their camp adventures next week!!