Thursday, January 24, 2019

Stupor Thursday.....Thinking of Mother.....

Today has been hard.
Mother is in the final stage of her life.
Deanie was with her for much of the day.
Summer stayed with her this evening as did Nita.
I have spent the day doing therapy.
I cleaned.
I organized my tea towels and dishcloths.
I vacuumed.
I potted plants - mint for Sherry I brought from home and onions I bought in Groesbeck last week.


I strung up a string of cool white lights in the front room window.....
and thought how bright some lights are shining even as others are fading.


I personally don't like the cool white as much as I do the warm white bulbs.


I had three strands of lights on this tree and two of them had gone out.
I undecorated the whole tree and added two 100 count strands of LED warm white bulbs.


For some reason, lights are important to me.


I must have them. 
Not brilliant blinding lights but soft comforting ones.


I am thinking tonight that people are like lights.
Some are really bright.....like my grandchildren.
I thought of my youngest ones.....Rayne, Trystan, Kailey, Harrison and Logan.
They are the brilliant white lights shining all young and bright.
Then there is the white lights of my older grands....Sam, Faith and Levi.
Bold and steady lights.
I think of the new LED lights reflecting my children....Summer, Jesse, Amber and Benjamin.
They have been shining for a good while now and will shine for many long years more.
I think of myself as an older warm white light.
Still glowing as the white fades into more of a soft amber glow.


Mother's light is fading tonight.....and it is time.
"Our times are in His hands."
Mother's time.
My time.
Your time.

We're going to bed early tonight so we can get up and leave first thing in the morning.
I plan to spend the day sitting with Mother,
Deanie requested 24 hour hospice care and there is a LVN with Mother tonight.
Life is a journey.
We are all on this same journey - just at different stages.



29 comments:

  1. I'm sorry. I don't think you can ever prepare for this time. I hope her passing leaves you with peace inside your heart. Hugs and prayers

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  2. I am so very sorry, this is just so hard. I totally agree with you about lights, and love the way you link them with different ages and stages. Blessings to you, sweet friend. God will be with you in every part of this journey.

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  3. Linda, what a beautiful way to describe a lifetime with lights! I too hope you have peace knowing you are a wonderful daughter! God Bless you during this hard time!

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  4. Oh Linda, I am so sorry and am praying for your Mother and you and your family. I know how difficult this time is. What a beautiful post. Thank you for sharing that with us.

    Blessings
    Gert

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  5. Praying for your mother and you and your family, Linda. May your Mother's journey to meet our Lord and begin her heavenly reward be peaceful.

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  6. Thinking about you right now, Linda!! Hope you are resting up tonight!
    Hugs,
    Trudy

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  7. Prayers for all your family Linda at this time of your Mom's Life. Hugs and Love.
    Joy

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  8. I love your analogy with the lights and life. I am praying for you my friend. I know that you have been well aware that your mom is living her last days, but it is still hard. I hope you know your blogger friends all love you and are thinking of you!

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  9. Linda ,I am praying for your mother and you
    and your family.

    Tina

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  10. This journey is the most difficult one. I have been on it four times in the past nine years and it is not something I ever want to do again. Still there is in it the sense of being on holy ground. I am glad that you are going, Linda. Your mother may be waiting fo you. Both of my parents waited for me. There is such joy ahead for your mom. Think on those things. (And I am praying for you because I know your heart is already bruised with the loss of Reaoma so recently. God is good. He will comfort.)

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  11. Linda, Please hug your mom for me, please. I miss my own mother so much. I always long for one more hug. As my own mother was passing, I rubbed her feet so she could walk with Jesus when she got to heaven. She always loved her feet rubbed. Sending a hug for you my friend. Your describing the lights has deep thought. The cleaning and organizing is your therapy. Be safe,you are in my prayers and thoughts. Blessings to all, love you, xoxo, Susie

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  12. Oh, I am so sorry. What a difficult time for you. Know that my thoughts and prayers are with you.

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  13. So true we are all like lights. Sorry your ranch time is getting cut short but it is important that you spend time with your mother while there is still time. You do let your light shine for others in so many ways. Prayers for you and yours as you go through a very difficult time.

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  14. Your Mother is blessed to have such love and care and it is a testimony to others how you and your siblings have cared for her even after a very difficult childhood. I pray you have peace during this most difficult time.

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  15. My heart is with you, Linda. I've been there and know how hard it is. As your mother's light dims here on earth, it grows brighter in heaven. Praying continually for you, your mom and your family. You are a good daughter and always have been.

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  16. prayers for all of you as you go through the dimming of your mothers light. for strength for all of you. I love your analogy of lights and it is so true. I to like low warm lights in the house. just not as many as you have. I don't like bright lights in the house at night, but love the bright light of sunshine, at night I like the warm glow like yours. hugs

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  17. Prayers for you and your family at this time Linda.

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  18. Thinking of you at this difficult time, Linda.

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  19. Linda, I know this is a difficult time. You have a lot of memories, good and bad, but you just muddle through this. So glad your family is close by - y'all hug each other a lot today - it really does help.
    I'll send you an email soon to check on you. Prayers for all of you.

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  20. Dear Linda, Sending love and prayers for you and your dear Mother.
    Am thankful you have your family and Louis Dean by your side at this
    stressful time.
    Phyllis

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  21. Glad you are going to be with her. This is, as Vee said, a holy time. May her passing be easy and may God give you peace and comfort. You have been a wonderful, loving, generous daughter.

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  22. Linda, thinking of you as I so feel your hurt. I remember my sister and I sitting with our dear mother as her light faded and then went out in this life, but shinning brighter in heaven. You are in my heart and prayers. Love You.

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  23. Praying for you and your family. It's a hard time, I know. God's timing is always perfect. May you find peace in His love and care.

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  24. thinking of you. Our lights keep shining wherever and whatever happens. Kia kaha

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  25. I am so sorry,Linda. Your light analogy is perfect. So true. It is so difficult for us to let go no matter what our beliefs are, isn't it? I believe she will be in a place to see the brightest white shining light of all and colors we can't even imagine. God speed to her and bless you as you watch her light fade. xo Diana

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  26. I am here late - but I think on Facebook from you - that your dear mother is gone. I am so, so, so sorry. My mom died 1-30-03 and I still miss her every day. Hugs and prayers to you. Love, sandie

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  27. You are a beautiful writer and your words are very moving. Take care of yourself and stay strong.

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