Tuesday, May 25, 2021

My Kansas City Family - Kind and Considerate!

 It's been like a dream - the days I spent in Kansas City with my newly found siblings.
Nita was talking on the way home about how the K and C  in Kansas City could stand for Kind and Considerate. That's how we found nearly everyone we met there from my siblings and other gfamily members to the people walking beside us on the streets, in the shops and everywhere we went.


Friday was an extra special day for me.


I slept late and went out to a corner coffee spot for a cup and a scone, sitting outside on the little patio area soaking up the feeling of being in Kansas City!


When it started to rain, I went back to the hotel and stretched out to read a few more chapters of this fascinating story. (I finished the book on my way back to Texas!)

Buster picked me up early in the afternoon - perfect timing!

It rained every day we were there - but then again, it's rained nearly everyday everywhere lately!
Louis Dean said it rained every day I was gone plus the day I came home.....and today... Monday!
However, we didn't let the rain interfere with what we were doing.

Buster drove me around Kansas City and showed me all his old hang outs, schools and places he and our father had frequented.

The showers had stopped by the time we got to the cemetery.


I had not anticipated the emotions I felt as I stood there looking down at my father's grave.


I'm tearing up again even now as I write this.
At long last, I know my father's name.
I have a name.
I'm a Gage.
I stood there thinking, 'Because he was....I am.'
I don't believe he ever knew about me, but Buster and I prayed holding hands right there at the grave, as he introduced me, then he said, "If he didn't know you before, he knows you now."
It was fitting that I should be standing beside my brother at that time.
Back in March, on the day he and Rita were to have that first telephone conversation with me, Buster had come to visit his father's grave early that Sunday morning.
Now here it was just two months later and we are standing there together.

When we left our father's grave, Buster said he wanted to stop and see his little brother who only lived one day. His name was Raymond.....
That means I have two baby brothers who died shortly after birth.......in addition to Raymond there is Clayton Collins, Jr.

Nita and Mike had left that morning to drive two hours to the place where her father was buried.
So she and I both were visiting our fathers' graves that day.

Buster and I continued our walk down Memory Lane.....driving around town before going to his house....which is the house he grew up in.


His house smells so good!!
He burns a certain incense and I bought some to bring home with me the next day!

We looked at old photos and talked about them.
Anna Marie is Buster's fiance and they grew up together.
She was in the 4th grade and he in the 8th. 
I love the 'history' they have together!


She was the one who found these family photos in her old church directories.
I added the names and date to this and it may have been a few years earlier than 1968.
A happy family of five.


The next directory photo was a family of four.......

Friday evening we three drove to the Italian restaurant, Trezo Mare, to meet my sister Rita.
We arrived first and Anna Marie was all set to record this first meeting.....but in all the excitement...it didn't record but she did get this pic!


I absolutely LOVE that Rita is holding her arms out for me!
Yes, I am tearing up again as I look at this photo.


Meet my sister, Rita, and her husband, Thomas.
The next day they celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary!
We talked and laughed, ate and told stories and had the best time!


The one and only photo I got of the three of us.

We had such a good time that we took our party over to their daughter's house.
 Tom had gone ahead of us to buy dessert and was waiting for us when we arrived.
Rita and Tom are having some major renovations done at their home, so their daughter offered hers since she was out of town with her family.


Let me tell you, that strawberry pie was exquisite!
And those huge cinnamon rolls! Oh, my!

My sister was on Critter Duty much like I do down at the ranch.


Here I am petting the bunny!
In the bottom cage were two hedgehogs.
I loved the custom built cages which include kennels for their dogs.
Thanks to my sister for these pics as my phone had died and I had not plugged it in all the way so it wasn't charged like I thought it would be.

We sat around in a circle on comfy cushioned chairs in the den and talked late into the night.
It.was.wonderful.

It was well after midnight when Buster and Anna Marie dropped me off at the hotel and I was in bed fast asleep before they even got home!

Saturday morning, Buster picked me up at 11:00 and we made some more visits to the past.


This was our grandparents home.
I know he told me their names but I can't remember what they were.
My mother has actually been in this house.
The one story she told me about my father was that he had taken her to meet his parents.
Why she would tell me this and yet still refuse to tell me his name will always baffle me.


This is the grandparents with Buster - photo taken inside the house pictured above.

We met my brother's daughter, Ashley, and her two youngest children at the Cracker Barrel for lunch.


She reminds me of my daughter, Amber, and her children were the cutest and best behaved children in the entire restaurant!


More sight seeing on our way back to Buster's house.


Such beautiful homes!


Lots to see in Kansas City!

I love looking at all the old photos!


A younger Buster......


.....and a bit older one, but just as handsome!

Meeting my siblings for the very first time has got to be THE most meaningful moments of this trip....and the next most meaningful time was when Buster took me downstairs to the basement.


This is where I feel like I 'met' my father....here at the workshop he built.
See the drawers there with that first one open?
Buster said our father had kept these drawers oiled with grease so they would slide in and out with ease.
The things inside are pretty much as he left them back in 1969. Buster had pulled that top drawer out three months ago and had been trying to push it back in ever since. Now, my brother is strong and works out so he was surprised when he could NOT get that drawer back in.
Then when we were down there on Saturday afternoon, Buster slid it in as easy as it could be.


I stood where my father has stood, walked where he has walked, saw what he has seen......touched what he has touched.


The basement is made of stones and he had painting them a blue/green color.


You can see a little of the color in this pic.
Buster said he remembers his dad taking this old oil lamp with them when they went fishing.
It still hangs where it has always hung.


Our father built this homemade table saw.


This looks like something Louis Dean would do.
The more I get to to know the man my father was, the more I think he may have been a lot like Louis Dean. He was a good man, a hard worker and he loved his children. 


Buster gave me these tools to keep and Louis Dean took the bolt loose and hung it in the middle of the tool and put the bolt back on. He's planning on taking a nice piece of wood and making a plaque to mount the tool on and I can hang it.

Yes, the time we spent in the basement was the closest I felt to knowing the man who was my father.

We all went out to dinner Saturday night at a great Mexican restaurant.


Our last night together!
The waiter took our pic and you can see someone photo bombed it!
Anna Marie chatted her up and we all had a lot of fun together.


Buster's oldest grandson surprised us by coming over to join us after he got off work.
He's 17 years old and works two jobs!
I was super impressed that he wanted to come meet me!
Ashly did not look like she was old enough to have a 17 year old!


I love that Buster is open with his emotions.
He is comfortable in his own skin and is a truly generous hearted and loving guy!


He and Anna Marie are perfect for each other!
We enjoyed every single minute we were all together!
I intend on visiting again and bringing Louis Dean with me.
He's going to love them and they will love him!
I have one more sister to meet and maybe that will happen on my next visit.

It was late when we went to bed Saturday night but we didn't have to get up nearly as early as we did to come up here! We were on the road by 9:00 but, due to heavy traffic in Oklahoma, we did not get into Fort Worth until nearly 7:00 Sunday night.


I transferred my bags to my car and then I had to get gas - which wasn't as easy as it should have been.
My credit card didn't work so I had to go to two different stations before I realized I was putting the card in wrong! I made a quick visit to Lillian's and her granddaughter, Tara was there!
She's been doing quite a bit for her grandmother lately aand visits nearly every week. plus she does all her laundry now. I know Lillian is so much happier!
I didn't linger long since I needed to get home before it got completely dark......


and I just barely made it!
Louis Dean was sitting outside on the driveway with his glass of tea waiting for me.
I didn't go in the house immediately since I knew I would start picking up and putting up, so we sat out there and visited for awhile before we had to go in when it started raining.....again.

There was quite a bit of damage control.
If I had to give him a score, it would be a C+.
I shut cupboard doors, wiped off the fridge doors, put up all the diches on the counters, wiped off the stove, moved the dishes in one cupboard back to where I had them. He had moved the white bowls up to another shelf and rearranged things. Problem with that is I am too short to reach them the way he had them - so I put them back. I got the kitchen put back to rights except for cleaning the fridge and the floor and then I went to bed.

I dealt with all the rest of it today.


Look at all the Kansas City BBQ sauces Rita gave us!
And the big wine glasses will be reminders of all things 'Kansas City.'


Rita and I are of the same mind about using our pretty things, so my wine glass can do double duty as  my tea glass!


I had to go to the store today so I hit up Big Lots and found Louis Dean some bath products.
He does love a good bubble bath!
He's pretty happy to have me home again.


I hung this sign from Buster and Ann Marie up today.


Buster sent me this beautiful poem on my way home yesterday.


I am closing this journal entry with a 54 second video of my first meeting with Buster.

I can hardly keep my eyes open and I have roughly proofed this, but I need to go to bed now.

Thank you all for the kind comments and prayers for me.
It's been a long journey and I am so grateful I have not only a happy ending - but a brand new beginning of my relationships to my newly found siblings.
I know I may have forgotten some things but, if I have, I can do a follow up post tomorrow!
















18 comments:

  1. Linda, I cannot tell you how much I enjoyed reading your post today....I am so very happy for you! This was life changing for you after so many years....how wonderful! Warm hugs!

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  2. Hi Linda,
    Reading this post brought back memories of meeting my birthday family for the first time some years back. It was a wonderful and emotional experience to finally have so many questions answered. So glad that everything went well and that you now part of this kind and loving family. Have a good week.

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  3. So very happy for you to have this "closure," which is really more like an opening door.

    Love that photo of Lillian and her granddaughter.

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  4. What an amazing journey of discovery for you!!! AWESOME.

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  5. This is one trip you will never forget. What a wonderful family you have. the old and the new are so loving and true. What a blessing to be a part of a happy family like that !

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  6. Such a beautiful story. Ah, I teared up so many times reading this.

    Did I tell you that last year we found out through 23 and me that my Dad's brother had a son he never knew about? My cousin was looking for his father. He'd been raised by his mother's parents and the family wasn't all that loving to him since he'd been born out of wedlock and his mother didn't really want him. Sadly my uncle was in the late stages of cancer and didn't respond well to him. He and I have kept up with each other and he has met my uncles at least one of my uncles daughters who has fully embraced having a brother.
    We are hoping to met up in TN in September. Tim and I are taking my parents on a road trip to visit family and we'll meet up with my cousin too!

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  7. Am so happy for you to find your extended family and be able to get to know them. Great pictures and wonderful memories.

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  8. love that video. i can see and hear the joy and fun you had, just in that alone. enjoyed all the words and all the pics and seeing you with the rest of your family.... i am thinking with the way your family has been growing, if you ever have a reunon you may have to rent the the Cowboys Stadium. ha ha..
    so glad you found them and the visit went so well.

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  9. Truly a magical time for you and your new found family.
    They sound so wonderful and welcoming.
    God is so good about returning to you what the "locust" had destroyed.
    I loved reading every word and seeing the love filled photos.
    Rest today and enjoy remembering.
    Sue

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  10. What a wonderfully uplifting time you had!! I can truly relate to this, because I never knew my father. I think buster looks like you, and you could not have had a better or more meaningful time. Really, the trip of a lifetime, literally!

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  11. You have really been on a journey- a beautiful journey! I loved seeing each picture and reading each word.
    P.S. Send us rain! We are in a drought here!!

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  12. I am so happy for you and can just feel your excitement...and emotions! You have enough here for a BOOK! Hugs!

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  13. I mean this in a good way! That you did so much and learned so much in this one weekend, it could be written as a book on it's own!

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  14. Fantastic post - so glad it all went so fine. Cheers

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  15. Thanks, Linda, for sharing the story of your meeting you other family members. It is clear you were all so happy to meet up and sure this is only the first of many more future get togethers and next time with Louis Dean as well.

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  16. Wow...such an incredible and beautiful story! Like Vee said, this brings closure but also opens up a whole new chapter. Thank-you for sharing. God is good!

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  17. oH I loved this post so much. Thank you for sharing it with me. This was the greatest of all. Wow. I am so happy for you. I love the basement/workbench/tools. That is really really special...that you could actually be where your dad was, touching the things he loved...and I'm sure he was smiling down at you from heaven and blessing you. That is really really wonderful. I'm teary eyed just thinking about it. Thank you so much.

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